You know the way monogamous couples have sex after one of them returns
from a long trip away? That's how we have sex all the time.
ANMD: In an open relationship, not only are you not shackled by your partner, but also, excepting occasional emotional roadblocks and Feelings that need to be addressed, you're on your adventure with them!
ANML: And that makes it even better.
ANMD: It's so awesome. And the communication is amazing.
ANML: What?
ANMD: Ha.
ANML: Sorry. Go on.
ANMD: Only in this relationship do I realize how little I communicated, how emotionally closed I was with my previous partners.
ANML: Yes!! I look back on my previous relationships and I can't believe how uncommunicative I was. It's like I had taken a Vow of Silence about my feelings. The only thing that mattered was getting along, avoiding conflict, never being high-maintenance or, God forbid, needy.
ANMD: An open relationship is Communication Bootcamp. It can’t survive without free and frequent airing of feelings, so it forces you to talk, talk, talk.
ANML: Which is more fun than it sounds, I promise!
ANMD: Talking becomes easier and easier, and you become happier and happier with the solid emotional foundations you’re building with your partner.
ANML: It's the most incredible feeling, knowing that you can say anything and still be safe and loved.
ANMD: Tell me something crazy about yourself!
ANML: Okay! Then you tell me something you've never told anybody before! And then let's hold each other and make out!
[SUPER INTENSE CONVERSATION REDACTED]
[SUPER INTENSE MAKEOUTS REDACTED]
ANMD: I’m going to run out of secrets!
ANML: We should all have such problems.
ANMD: Shall we talk about Reclamation Sex?
ANML: Sure! You know the way monogamous couples have sex after one of them returns from a long trip away? That's how we have sex all the time.
ANMD: Seriously. It's ridiculous. The first time I ever saw someone outside the relationship, you were worried that Everything Would Be Ruined between us. Instead, it was electric -- I just couldn't resist you. I longed for the familiarity and the closeness we shared, but at the same time I wanted to frenziedly reaffirm my love. And it was awesome. It’s like make-up sex, but there wasn't a fight.
And it seems like that's the way it always is. I adore you. Nobody captivates me like you, and nobody can f*ck me like you can. I'm with you because I want to be with you, because you are the best for me.
ANML: It's really just a game, because we know that at the end of the day, no matter what we do with other people, we're always going to come home to each other.
ANMD: Yes. It’s wonderful.
ANML: We don't know how long it will last. We've talked about the possibility of eventually becoming monogamous, but neither of us feels ready. Maybe one day we'll decide that our adventure has changed and doesn't involve sex with other people anymore. But right now this is the adventure we're on, and I can speak only for myself, but it's the greatest adventure of my life.
ANMD: In an open relationship, not only are you not shackled by your partner, but also, excepting occasional emotional roadblocks and Feelings that need to be addressed, you're on your adventure with them!
ANML: And that makes it even better.
ANMD: It's so awesome. And the communication is amazing.
ANML: What?
ANMD: Ha.
ANML: Sorry. Go on.
ANMD: Only in this relationship do I realize how little I communicated, how emotionally closed I was with my previous partners.
ANML: Yes!! I look back on my previous relationships and I can't believe how uncommunicative I was. It's like I had taken a Vow of Silence about my feelings. The only thing that mattered was getting along, avoiding conflict, never being high-maintenance or, God forbid, needy.
ANMD: An open relationship is Communication Bootcamp. It can’t survive without free and frequent airing of feelings, so it forces you to talk, talk, talk.
ANML: Which is more fun than it sounds, I promise!
ANMD: Talking becomes easier and easier, and you become happier and happier with the solid emotional foundations you’re building with your partner.
ANML: It's the most incredible feeling, knowing that you can say anything and still be safe and loved.
ANMD: Tell me something crazy about yourself!
ANML: Okay! Then you tell me something you've never told anybody before! And then let's hold each other and make out!
[SUPER INTENSE CONVERSATION REDACTED]
[SUPER INTENSE MAKEOUTS REDACTED]
ANMD: I’m going to run out of secrets!
ANML: We should all have such problems.
ANMD: Shall we talk about Reclamation Sex?
ANML: Sure! You know the way monogamous couples have sex after one of them returns from a long trip away? That's how we have sex all the time.
ANMD: Seriously. It's ridiculous. The first time I ever saw someone outside the relationship, you were worried that Everything Would Be Ruined between us. Instead, it was electric -- I just couldn't resist you. I longed for the familiarity and the closeness we shared, but at the same time I wanted to frenziedly reaffirm my love. And it was awesome. It’s like make-up sex, but there wasn't a fight.
And it seems like that's the way it always is. I adore you. Nobody captivates me like you, and nobody can f*ck me like you can. I'm with you because I want to be with you, because you are the best for me.
ANML: It's really just a game, because we know that at the end of the day, no matter what we do with other people, we're always going to come home to each other.
ANMD: Yes. It’s wonderful.
ANML: We don't know how long it will last. We've talked about the possibility of eventually becoming monogamous, but neither of us feels ready. Maybe one day we'll decide that our adventure has changed and doesn't involve sex with other people anymore. But right now this is the adventure we're on, and I can speak only for myself, but it's the greatest adventure of my life.
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